What I’m Reading
Jul
23
I am standing on the edge of a dangerous precipice and I need to be talked down, right quick. Help me, internet!
On a whim I started researching doctoral programs because, you know, what else do people do with a few month’s free time? There’s only so much Judge Joe Brown on the telly and I needed something to fill the hours. I thought I’d have a great laugh over the idiots that volunteer themselves for the torture of even more school after a Master’s degree, people like my cousin who get a PhD “just for the fun of it”, and then I’d resume my usual reading of US Weekly and the Huffington Post. Except… wait a minute! I didn’t know that if you get accepted to a doctoral program they waive the tuition fees. And they actually pay you? What kind of school is this?!
Well, it’s the number one school for Library and Information Science, is what. Where I would never in a million years get accepted. Even if I wanted to get a PhD, which I totally don’t!
Or do I?
It could be a way to access more opportunities. I could get a job in a big university library, where I would do awesome things like photocopy my butt at 2 a.m. after drinking a bottle of Pinot Gris in the stacks while writing my dissertation. Where everyone would have the same geeky dreams that I do, where cataloging does not mean perusing the latest J. Crew fashions, and where I would TOTALLY TEAR MY HAIR OUT FROM THE STRESS.
Why would I put myself through that? I already know how I get when I am in school. I am the total opposite of fun and pleasant. My feeble mind can only focus on one thing at a time and if you put a Statistics book in front of me it is going to be a shit storm of cranky NPW all over the place. I promise.
Of course, I am also a total masochist and so I continued to read about the requirements for the program. They want the best and brightest, eh? Well it just so happens that I am a total Ace Librarian! Dudes, I am so nerdy I am even in Beta Phi Mu. Shut up, I know.
So it couldn’t hurt to just apply, right? Because if I didn’t even get in then it would be a moot point as to whether or not I should get a PhD. They would decide for me! (I am totally getting a stomach cramp just thinking about a rejection letter.) The stress! I want to go back to the lazy days of being content with my measly Master’s degree.
Talk me out of it. Please. I like maintaining the status quo. I really, really do.
Wait a second. You don’t even think I could get in, do you? You think they would totally reject me. My intellect is at stake! I must get in at all costs!
And that right there is a preview of what I am like when I am enrolled in a school program. Please don’t let me subject Chris to that. The future of my sanity is in your hands.
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31 Responses to “I Would Definitely Make You All Call Me Dr. NPW”
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If you go back to school then you won’t have time to write hilariously entertaining blog posts for all your loyal readers, or make homemade ravioli, or organize CYOB…so don’t do it!!
Do it. Go back to school. If nothing else, it’s worth it to make people call you “doctor” like you mentioned.
Especially if your last name is “Jones,” “Evil,” or “Strangelove.”
Oh, I would so love to get my PhD. If you were me, you would definitely do it.
don’t do it. or at least that’s what i would tell myself. had a 4.0 for my mls but that doesn’t mean i liked it. don’t like deadlines and doing what others tell me.
so, you’re in beta phi mu? they sent an invitation a year or two ago – i’m still debating if i should join. i don’t even belong to ala. bad librarian.
I’m going to win the lottery and go back to school for “fun” someday. Laugh! Go ahead… laugh!
OR…
I’m going to go back to school with my son in 5 years and be his roommate. LMAO I actually said this to him tonight and then promptly choked on a nacho while LMAO. The family let me give myself a Heimlich Manuever…
Okay.. not really on that last sentence.
Is it the future of your sanity at stake or the future of your relationship with Chris!?!
I’m a bad person to ask because I just returned to school myself- to pursue my 6th year degree in administration. I love school though so I’d say go for it. But, then again, I’m a total nerd!
Do it…you have nothing to lose but your youth and sanity.
You’re a freakin genius cuz…go on and rock the casbah!
How come everyone else got invited to join Beta Phi Mu? I feel like the black sheep of the library family. I’ll be in the corner with my dunce cap – maybe I can change my blog to “the remedial librarian”.
But seriously – you know how I feel. I’m just as torn as you are, but I would lean toward focusing on your career because I can’t see how a PhD is going to make that much difference.
I’m obviously not smart enough to get in anyway. But you are! And it’s better to think that you’re denying them your presence than to be rejected.
I’m not helping at all, am I?
I say don’t do it. PhDs are great and all, but in Library Science? (Remember, I’m a librarian, at least by training.) Have you looked at the actual curriculum? I’m getting sleepy just thinking about it, and I liked library school. If you haven’t, I would say get your hands on some of the doctoral course syllabi before making a decision about whether or not to apply.
Also, careerwise, you would likely have more opportunities with a second master’s in a field of interest to you than with a PhD in Library Science.
hmmm… I would love to have someone to commiserate with during my studies as well… how funny… one of my friends is a doctor and another is a nun…
I say do more research to see if it is really worth it and you will be able to use that degree for lots more $$$……because remember how you told us you were going to be rich and build us a wing on your mansion?? I am holding you to that.
Ooohhh! Do it! Then we can meet for drinks and commiserate. I’ll be applying for Ph.D. programs soon because there’s nowhere to go in my career without one. But…my friends in Library Science say that a Ph.D. is not essential for their careers and the pay increase is negligible. Lots for you to think about!
What school is this at? I doubt I’ll ever get a Ph.D., but that’s probably because I’m right in the thick of school and looking forward to being done with homework and papers.
I sooooo do not miss being in school. The worst part for me isn’t actually doing the work, although that sucks too–it’s that you can never call your time your own. Even when you’re out having fun, you always have that niggling guilty feeling because you know you should really be in the library, studying. I hate it.
THATS A LOT OF WORK, AND LIKE MUM SAYS, UNLESS YOU’RE MAKING A LOT MORE $$ IS IT WORTH IT REALLY?
I think you know how I feel. Cheap and used. Actually, maybe I’ll go to a brothel. Better than this crummy job.
As much as I am all for having a bevy of fun stories from your teaching assistant days, I do not relish the idea of possible stress, relocation, and rejection. Gah. But applying can’t hurt, can it? Shrug.
The only benefit you listed for getting a Ph.D. is photocopying your butt while drinking wine. You could do that now if you really wanted to, so I say don’t do it.
I agree with repressed librarian…get a 2nd masters. might I suggest classics? And, no, I don’t mean A Tale of Two Cities.
If I were you, I’d just wait for someone to give you an honorary doctorate, cause you know it’s going to happen.
They’d be fools not to want you!
I’d say give it a shot. IT CAN’T HURT JUST TO APPLY!
Of all the fine advice in your comments thus far, I think obviously R’s is the best. OK, or the Repressed Librarian. She makes some good points too. Good luck, my friend.
Well, you can only do it if it doesn’t affect your blogging. ‘Cause we blog readers are selfish, selfish beasts. Heh.
I’ve been tempted by the PhD several times before. Getting paid to go to school sounds like a dream come true to me. Unfortunately, most of what I’d want to study doesn’t come in PhD form.
But since your course of study does, I say go for it.
I won’t give advice, but I will say that the only way I’ll ever have a Ph.D. is if I get one of those Honorary ones that seem to be liberally distributed. I have done enough homework and written enough essays for one lifetime, and that’s final!
DO IT DO IT DO IT!!!! We can go to the same school and be cranky together, and then Mickey and Chris can keep each other company while our heads explode with useless knowledge! Doesn’t that sound like fun?
But if you do apply, apply to a place you’ll be sure to get into. Trust me, the rejection does not feel good.
Seriously, though. Do it. Think of all the blog fodder!
I’m praying for him.
Of course you’ll get in. And seriously, if you researched it, you must want to go. Even just a little bit.
Everyone tells me I should get my master’s and I have NO DESIRE. I don’t research anything, even when my current job said they’d pay for it.
Wait…people get PhDs for fun?
No harm in trying…
It sounds like a lot of fun!
But wouldn’t having Dr. in front of your name make it all worth it? Go for it!