This week a substitute teacher approached me in the library and said she wanted to let me know that the computers “were not letting her out to google”. She said it very gravely, like it was something I should be jumping up to investigate right then. I informed her that my computer was working fine, and the network seemed to be up and running smoothly (for once). She looked at me suspiciously and said, “Well, maybe it’s just not letting me get to google.”
Inwardly rolling my eyes, I got up from what I was working on and went to look at the computer where she was sitting. She had up the library catalog and I could see she had typed GOOGLE into the catalog search bar. I just don’t even… I can’t… my brain melted.
Still, me being me, I explained to her that she was using the library catalog, not a search engine. “Yes?”, she responded, like she couldn’t see how that was a problem. I then told her to erase the current URL and type in google.com. She clicked to the end of the URL and proceeded to backspace one letter at a time while I stood there grinding my teeth. Twenty-seven minutes later she finally, gingerly, tapped the caps lock key and wrote GOOGLE, and sat there looking at the screen. Didn’t hit enter. Didn’t ACTUALLY TYPE a URL at all.
And while I stared incredulously at the back of her head she muttered, “See? This is the problem with knowing your home computer so well. THIS computer is very strange.”
Guess she better just stay at home for the rest of her life then.